keen on patagonia

I have the unfortunate/fortunate luck of working right down the street from a Patagonia store. For the most part I exercise self-control when it comes to letting myself wander in there. Most times I don't let myself go in at all, sometimes I let myself go in but make sure to leave my wallet safely in the car where it cannot be emptied. That way the only manner in which I could score a brand new Patagonia hoody would be to stuff it in my bra and sneak out. And let's be real, no hoody is worth that.

Or so I thought until yesterday. No, I did not steal it. I bought it. For full price no less. But had I not had my wallet, I may have had to restort to stuffing it in my bra and making a break for it; I love it that much. You know how a lot of times when you buy a clothing item there's one or two things you really like about it and that's what sells you on it? Half the time one of those things is the price. Well, this hoody wasn't like that. It matched every single criteria I've ever had for a zip up hoody. It's like my soulmate of zip ups. The icing on the cake is the monkey thumbs, which I have made sure to point out in this little illustration.

I also bought that skirt. It was $35, which in Patagonia land is a total steal. I realize I may have been able to find something very similar at Target for $7.99, but knowing I only spent $7.99 would have made it feel cheaper. Also I keep imagining the white sand beaches and tropical cafes in Costa Rica, and I am really going to need something to wear there. Like that skirt. And a bathing suit.

Which is the original reason I even went to Patagonia in the first place. I have a bad neck which gets very angry when I try to tie something around the back of it. Especially when what I'm tying around it is the same thing holding my boobs up. My neck gets all super pissed and the muscles clench up and pretty soon I am a miserable and mean person. It's not a good scenario. But have you ever tried looking for a semi-decent bathing suit that does not tie around the neck? It's IMPOSSIBLE. I kid you not, just try it. Go check out Victoria's Secret bathing suits, of which there are hundreds, and there will be approximately ONE bathing suit that does not tie around the neck. And it will be designed with your 87-year-old grandmother in mind.

But in this regard Patagonia is also my friend because they have MULTIPLE bathing suits that do not tie around the neck and do not look like mom suits. So I ordered various bathing suit components from the Patagonia website, planning of course to return one set.

Despite the fact that I feel I have some very good reasons for spending a lot of money yesterday, I am feeling guilty about it today. Luckily, Patagonia is friendly the environment, so in that regard it's sort of like donating to a good cause.

Still I'm considering setting up shop on a street corner (preferrably the corner directly in front of the Patagonia store) with a little sign begging sympathy (and donations) because Patagonia has drained me of my resources.